Lead from the front. At least that’s what I’ve heard you should try and do but sometimes being the leader has it’s drawbacks. Like deciding to try mushroom coffee from a pouch that you found in the garage not knowing how long it’s been out there on the shelf.
One afternoon while rooting around hopefully for a jar of peanut butter on the overflow shelves or what a fancier household would call a pantry shelf, I came across a packet of Ryze Mushroom Coffee. No idea what it was really, no idea how long it’s been out there. I can say that I do remember seeing it out there for awhile, 1 year? 2? Sealed, I think?
Being more than an average coffee coinsure the decision to wean off the caffeinated delight isn’t an idea I toss around lightly. Moreover I am not what you’d call a fan of mushrooms. While I may not pick them off my plate, I certainly wouldn’t order them and usually make sure that there is more than just a mushroom on my fork before it enters my mouth. But, as I age I’m trying to be more mindful of my overall health and those that are in my immediate circle. So throwing caution to the wind I boil the water and take the big gulp.
Absolutely one of the worst tasting drinks that I have ever had, and I was a sailor then a bar owner and had tried many a drink. If the taste wasn’t bad enough, the smell cleared not only your sinuses but the room.
Now you’d think that one taste test would be enough wouldn’t you? Oh no… not by a long shot. Rather than be a laughing stock of my household I double down, touting the beneficial properties of this new found beverage, even trying to get family members onboard. Each morning I’d boil my water, add my scoop of Ryze Mushroom Coffee and drink it down. Many mornings I would chant before like a frat boy, CHUG! CHUG! CHUG!! and down it goes. All the while trying to convince my family to try it. My wife went as far as not wanting to be in the same room as my concoction because of the odor. I’d tell my son a little line that he once told me about having to work the closing shift, “Don’t nibble the turd, just take a big bite” before I chugged down my potion. No takers.
Now, I certainly don’t live in a vacuum and have internet so I absolutely searched out what others had said about this product. Smooth, pleasant taste, wonderfully aroma , blaaa blaa blaa. Had to be plants or paid advertisements. I really couldn’t find anyone posting the truth. That this product is the most foul and obnoxious medical elixir since the days of the traveling snake oil salesman.
To everyone’s surprise and to my own surprise I actually start feeling pretty good. I had no cravings for caffeine, my stomach felt better than it had in years if not decades so, the experiment as foul as it was seemed to be working. As the brown powder in the bag got lower I decided that I would continue this torcher and search the internet for another bag.
I found the companies website, I wanted to go to the source not an Amazon reseller, skipping over all their literature touting the benefits and wonderful taste, (yeah right) I ordered a bag of dark Ryze Mushroom Coffee.
The email comes telling me that my package is on it’s way and to get excited. Yeah, not excited but willing, is what I’d call it. I track the packages progress as it comes across the country and to my PO Box. As soon as I get notification that the package has arrived I drive down and snatch it up. Within minutes of being back home i open my kit. Kit, yes a kit. Complete with scoop, spoon, some electric whipping device, coffee, creamer, wooden bowl, coasters and some stickers. Boy they really are going all out on the razzle dazzle I say as I open the pouch of coffee.
The first thing I notice is the smell, not much at all, maybe a little like hot coco mix. I open the creamer, (probiotic) that smells pleasantly like coconut. Hmmm. I boil the water and take my first sip, HOLY CRAP, THIS STUFF IS GOOD. Nothing like the moldy, stale powder that I had been ingesting daily for nearly a month, this stuff is actually very smooth.
Of course my wife and son have had much fun watching me torture myself daily but even more so knowing that I was an absolute fool and drinking something that bad for that long for nothing.
Now I have to buy more coffee because all 3 of us are now enjoying Ryze Mushroom Coffee.
Even though I am most assuredly a fool, I did lead from the front.